Tag: living in italy

Jack’s Birthday Almost Staycation

by midgeguerrera, posted in Food - Eating In and Out!, Local Businesses, Stops Along the Journey - Sites Off the Tourist Track

Dear easygoing Jack has one giant quirk. He hates birthday parties, birthday hats, birthday presents – just about anything that has to do with birthdays. Now, me, I adore all the bellowing, trimming, gifts, chaos and energy of everything birthday. Since Jack’s birthday is mid-August, we have developed a compromise. Simply called, “Jack’s Birthday Staycation.” There are no gifts, no whistles no party favors. However, the staycation is not at home but fifteen minutes away at Hotel Ristorante Il Grottino.

Jack may hate birthdays but he loves cake from Pontelandolfo’s Diglio Forno!

Why drive a scant few kilometers up another mountain for the staycation? The place is fabulous. There is a beautifully landscaped pool surrounded by mountain vistas, an outdoor seating restaurant area with linen tablecloths – OMG I sound like a snob – comfortable rooms with balconies, and the food is terrific. For the past few years, to celebrate another trip around the sun, we have booked a room for a few nights at Il Grottino. Michele and Giovanna, our hosts are friendly, accommodating and love what they have built. In other words, it is perfect for Jack. (Is it too self serving to say it is also perfect for Jack’s adorable wife?)

Each morning we got up promptly – ha ha – slowly, tossed on a bathing suit and wandered downstairs. The hotel has an elevator so folks in their second and third acts can easily get to the upstairs rooms. There waiting for us was a set table with croissants and the smiling Giovanna. Soon cappucini ( no spell checkers it is not misspelled – that is plural for cappucino) arrived with whatever else we wanted. The blue sky over the mountain, cool mountain breeze and lovely piped in music made the morning bright. We wandered to the pool and did what we do best on vacation.

Read! For me, read and wrote. This book is fabulous and written by my pal Adele.

I am working on a couple of plays. ‘I’m Ann” is about a Sicilian woman’s experiences in the USA. “Born to the Sea” is an exciting new musical about the Swedish VASA ship. And – this is super exciting – my 9/11 themed play “Email: 9/12” is being produced in 2026 by a company in the Netherlands. I am creating a monologue or two that takes place in Den Haag. All projects needed a breath of fresh air and Il Grottino provides just that. Jack read, snoozed pool side and smiled a lot.

Each day between snoozing, reading and writing we ate seafood lunches outdoors under the pergola. I love impepata di cozze, mussels steamed and served with a dash of pepper and their own juices. Giovanna served me an enormous bowl and I grinned bigger than Jack grins. Our New Jersey friend Maryann C. was visiting so she got to come to Il Grottino too. She had what I thought was a riff on my favorite dish, La Zuppa di Cozze. The mussels were steamed with tomatoes and served with points of focaccia. It too was exceptional.

Il Grottino is known locally for its metre long pizza. The place was packed one night with whole families there for pizza. What else could we do but order a three foot plus long pizza. Cleverly, the super charged pizza is divided by toppings. Jack loves pizza Margherita, Maryann wanted vegetables and I only eat pizza con tonno. The thin crusted mammoth pizza arrived with sections of each topping. All three of us dug right in and enjoyed each bite.

One of the reasons we come back each year is that the food is great. We also come back because the staff and owners are willing to go the extra mile to make guests comfortable. The real reason – being there makes Jack smile.

Happy Birthday Staycation to Jack. Thank you to Il Grottino, Giovanna and Michele.

Ci vediamo prossima volta.

Midge Guerrera

Need an Italian fix? Two thoughts – one pick up a copy of my humorous travel memoir – Cars, Castles, Cows and Chaos – sip wine and feel the moments. Second, think about Cooking in the Kitchens of Pontelandolfo next year.

Shepherd’s Pie starts at Macelleria Mancini

by midgeguerrera, posted in Any Day in Pontelandolfo, Food - Eating In and Out!, Local Businesses

The following blog may contain content that vegans, vegetarians and lovers of small farm animals may find disturbing. Reader discretion is advised.

Did you ever lust for something so much that the thought of it made you salivate? Admit it, you have. This week all I could think about was eating lamb. I love roasted lamb, lamb chops, lamb-burgers and most of all real hearty Shepherd’s Pie made with – what else – lamb. The little baa baas had been tempting me for a month. Daily, I watched the little ones romp in Pontelandolfo’s verdant fields, stop traffic and then suddenly they disappeared . Disappearing lambs? My mind was wandering hither and yon, over hill and dale, wondering where Bo Peep was hiding the baby sheep.

Love the Lamb Jam. Driver beware.

My tummy wanted to find them. That is a big juicy lie. I did not want to find a lamb, I wanted to find mutton before it became mutton. Knowing that I would make Jack insane if I didn’t stop talking about Shepherd’s Pie, I dashed down the hill to Marcelleria Mancini.

One of the primary joys of living in Pontelandolfo is being able to shop at a real butcher, baker and cheese maker. Stefano Mancini of Marcelleria Mancini is an amazing butcher. All of his meats are locally sourced and he prides himself on working only with select farms. The meat found at Marcelleria Mancini tastes like meat that was on the hoof a few days ago. Free range, scrumptious and not spiced up with hormones. Of course, I would head there for lamb.

Stefano, our always smiling butcher.

What is wonderful about Stefano is that he doesn’t look at me like I’m crazy when I ask for something that most of my neighbors would ever ask for. Like agnello macinato – ground lamb. Not just ground but thickly ground. Here, ground meats are passed through the grinder a few times. For my rustic dish I wanted it rough.

Stefano looks at me and asked – what are you making? My Italian will get us fed, a room and a hospital but how do I explain Shepherd’s Pie – torta dei pastori? Sauté lamb with veggies and cap with butter-rich mashed potatoes. As I described it, I could see it and couldn’t wait to make it.

Dashing to the back room, Stefano returned holding aloft a leg of lamb. Literally, aloft. He was holding the leg by the tibia (shin bone), above the knee was the meaty thigh. La coscia sarebbe perfetto, he said. This is the first time that I realized that the leg of lamb we buy is really the thigh! That incredible meat would be perfect for my Shepherd’s Pie.

As the butcher deboned the meat, I asked if I could have the bones for bone broth. He was impressed that I would make a broth and promptly dashed the bones into manageable pieces. From leg to grinder to packaged, I soon had the lamb I needed for dinner and a package of bones.

Don’t tell Jack, please but another thing I love about Macelleria Mancini are their “pretend you spent the day making interesting meat based dishes.” Stefano’s fiancé, Ilaria, creates amazing to go dishes. As their website says: Avete voglia di qualcosa di sfizioso ma il tempo stringe !?! Passa a trovarci…tutti i giorni prepariamo diversi “pronti a cuocere”…con carni fresche e di qualità ! Craving something tasty but running out of time!?! Come visit us…every day we prepare different “ready-to-cook” dishes…with fresh, quality meats!

Pretty Isn’t It!

My Shepherd’s Pie was scrumptious- and I had made enough for a couple of days. After cooking the base, I made the mashed potatoes. No, I tried to make the mashed potatoes. Where are all my potatoes??? Merde, I only had four little potatoes. That would never be enough for my mashed topping. What do do???

Think about where you are and use what you have. What did I have corn meal for polenta? I made a batch of polenta, added Parmesan cheese, and mixed the polenta with with the potatoes. It was absolutely fabulous. My mashed potato – pontenta may become a carb mainstay.

Wherever you are enjoy what you make. Buy local and serve every meal with a smile.

And remember, you too can always come and Cook in the Kitchens of Pontelandolfo.

Ci vediamo prossima volta.

Midgeguerrera

Happy Holidays from the Sannio Hills

by midgeguerrera, posted in Any Day in Pontelandolfo

This year we are celebrating the holidays in the Sannio Hills of Southern Italy. The house is ablaze with lights. Thanks to our talented landlord, there is even a 20 foot tall Italian flag that seems to billow in the breeze. Inside, with the pellet fire roaring and a single malt to sip, I’ve been ensconced in a comfy chair binge reading a series by Carlen O’Connor. The books set in a small Irish village made me realize that village life, wherever your village is, has a similarity. People taking care of each other. Holiday events filling calendars. Decorations making every village even more beautiful. Scents of baking, prepping and bubbling fill kitchens. The shops are stocked with “must have” new goods and their instagram feeds are bursting with photos. We are blessed to live in such a village.

Is everything perfect? Nah. That charming roaring pellet fire is our boiler. That means freezing or filling the pellet stove with 30 pound bags of pellets, cleaning the pellet stove and dragging the ash vacuum outside to empty; cursing at the error 12 on the freakin’ pellet stove; searching for that wool sweater that we (Jack) swore he left here; and of course seeing mountains of baccalà in every market and enough delectable sweets to keep me lying on the couch binging holiday movies for weeks. Sounds terrible – not! Yes, there is snow on the mountain peaks. Yes, the wind is whipping in the Sannio Hills. Yes, our cheeks are rosy. AND YES this little village is full of happiness, good cheer and enriching our lives.

Village life and Pontelandolfese have warmed my soul. Nicola makes sure the too heavy for me to even drag bags of pellets are near our door. Lina arrived with enough homemade pasta for me to freeze for Christmas Day. Adele dropped everything when I had a WHOA was that an earthquake vertigo attack and quickly got me into see a specialist. Our car was in the shop for 7 days – don’t ask. Alessio has turned his free time into “drive Midge wherever she needs to go time.” Other people hearing through the village network that our car was on the fritz, offered to drag our butts wherever we needed to be.

Starting with the December 8th lighting of the Christmas lights in Piazza Roma, we have been out and about enjoying the season. Pontelandolfo, as I’ve bellowed from the rooftops before, is full of creative and energetic folks who produce events, art, and cultural happenings. Check out the calendar –

This holiday season enjoy your village, wherever you are. Spread the good cheer, love and peace that warms the hearts of others. Buon Natale! Buona Feste!

Midge

PS. La Befana arrives during epiphany bringing candy or coal to Italian Children throughout the world. Take a peek at the play I wrote. It is available through Next Stage Press. Mamma Mia, La Befana??!!

PPS. Did I mention the lights? Enjoy –

Lessons Learned at the Theatre

by midgeguerrera, posted in Any Day in Pontelandolfo

One blustery Saturday night, the theater in Pontelandolfo was full. Men and women of all ages braved the cold to see a production developed by two amazing women, Michela Delli Veneri and Fiorella De Michele. Posters for Conto su di Me – Libere e Vivere had been zapping around social media and tacked up everywhere. I had no idea what to expect. The one thing I did know, was that Michela and Fiorella, both powerful women, would present something professional and relevant. Nestling into my seat, I looked around and noticed the hand made signs surrounding the space – My Body My Choice”, “Non Una di Meno”, “no è no” “Girl Power “.

Women Can Do Anything

Reading the signs triggered a response this 75 year old woman didn’t anticipate – sadness. Silently, tears dribbled down under my glasses. Didn’t we march for these same thoughts and rights when I was a girl? How many generations of women need to be treated like chattel? How long will society allow the minimization of women? Suddenly, I realized I was going to be in for a roller coaster ride of a production.

The multi media event was well developed and staged. This wasn’t a pound the idea on your head lecture but a thought provoking presentation that coupled actresses with real psychologists. The theme – Economic Abuse of Women. When I heard that, I thought equal pay for equal work or how to crack the glass ceiling. After seeing the performance I realized, economic abuse by one’s partner is horrific on both an emotional and physical level. Frankly, I was embarrassed that I had never realized holding back and controlling money was a form of abuse. I should have realized it. Having grown up in house full of tears, shouts and begging for love. Money, or the lack of it, was an embarrassing topic. My parents separated when I was about 11. Dad was caught “in the cookie jar” and mom was – well not very stable. Being the obnoxious child in our family, it was my job to go and “ask” my father for money. Mom, my sister and I were often just making do. My lack of patience and pushiness may be learned behavior. I learned how to be tenacious. One event that crushed me was my eight grade dance. After my asking dad for the money for a new dress and getting turned down, I was decimated when my younger sister came home from school crying and told me that a boy in her class whose mom was a ‘good pal’ of my dad’s just got an expensive train set from our father. I didn’t call it economic abuse – I was 14 – but after seeing this show, I realized that causing that kind of pain is indeed a form of abuse.

The staging was interesting. An actress would enter the set and tell their story. Then, the psychologists would either interact with the actress or talk about the case. The psychologists were wonderful performers in their own rights. I felt as though I was part of a group session and was throughly engaged. One scene that obviously tugged on my heart opened with a mom and son going to see a therapist. As the little boy was in his session, the mom shared her grief at not being allowed to use any money – money her husband earned – to pay for the boy to participate in a traditional dance company. Obviously the mom didn’t have money of her own. The arguments that the boy witnessed included screaming, pushing and threats. The husband would not give up a penny for this child to join the other children in the village and dance. Yes, they could afford it. He controlled the money – period. That seems like such a small thing but the impact on both the mom and the child was incredible. The dad was so controlling. The money was being withheld as a method of controlling and punishment. Damn, I had been there.

Always having worked and maintaining my own bank accounts, it took a while for me to understand the stories of women who were totally dependent upon their partners. Stranded at home without cars, driver’s licenses or any form of recreation that wasn’t blessed by the king of the house put women in dangerous positions. The psychologists brought the truth of this battering home for me.

Media, music, monologues and scenes seamlessly worked together to further the theme. I hope the young women I saw in the audience realized, they are in control of their destiny. I hope the young men in the audience learned that men who promulgate any kind of physical, emotional or economic violence against women are cretins. ( I wanted to use really bad words here about abusive men – FFFFFFbomb ASSSSSSh#$#^$.)

Grazie a Tutti!!!!

Ci vediamo,

Midge Guerrea

Visti Pontelandolfo in 2025! We are now organizing Cooking in the Kitchens of Pontelandolfo and a Writer’s Retreat. Message me for more information. We have very few spots!

Writers’ Refuge in the Sannio Hills

by midgeguerrera, posted in Nonna's Trips & Events

I can’t believe our first playwright’s retreat has just ended and I am about to blab on about 2025. How could I not?! The playwrights who just left after their ten day writing adventure were effusive in their praise. (When I get their video done, I will write about their catalysts for creativity – like my falling in a deep hole during their ruzzolo, cheese rolling game.) Back to 2025!

Literally Italy (that’s my new moniker) and Scott Editorial put their heads together and came up with a writer’s retreat with a few twists.  2025 Writers’ Refuge in the Sannio Hills takes its name from the rifugi, mountain huts that provided a haven for shepherds.  Dear writers, imagine a nurturing sanctuary that provides the time and place to work on your creative projects. In addition to time for your own daily writing, workshops, group feedback, and one-on-one critique sessions will support your work. The best part is, you are able to write in a villa, in a bar, outdoors and wherever your muse takes you. The June 21 to June 28 retreat is only open to eight writers.

The “Write Where Your Are” 2024 Playwrights enjoyed writing through out two villages.

Participants in the 2025 Writers’ Refuge in Sannio Hills will share large, double rooms with ensuite bathrooms in La Locanda della Presuntuosa, a unique villa built into a mountain on acres of land. The villa includes a swimming pool, tennis court, washing machine, and park like grounds that are minutes from Pontelandolfo and Morcone village life. Savory meals are cooked by an Italian chef using local produce.  Our chef spoiled the playwrights with homemade pasta, interesting sides and succulent roasted meats. The Tiramisu was incredible! Nothing came in a box or wrapped in plastic. This is Southern Italian farm to table home cooking. She will spoil those who come to the Refuge too.

The Italian landscape and village life are inspirational.  For additional character studies, shuttles will bring you and your computer to Pontelandolfo’s Piazza Roma caffès or the bars a bit further out of town. Imagine sitting in a sunny piazza, sipping Prosecco and finishing that novel, short story or memoir. Or imagine wending your way up the hill to Morcone’s historic center and sharing work in this cool bar.

Amy Scott, the founder of Scott Editorial, will lead the writers’ retreat. Amy is a PhD candidate with a Master’s in Creative & Critical Writing and a BA in English Literature. With 20 years’ experience editing fiction and non-fiction, she has gained extensive knowledge of both the self-publishing and traditional sectors of the industry. For the last four years, she has been running writers’ retreats in Italy and the UK and is a guest lecturer on undergraduate and postgraduate courses, teaching the importance of editing. This year, Scott Editorial has joined forces with the University of Gloucestershire, where, along with a selection of creative writing professors, Amy is delivering workshops to help new authors develop their craft.

Literally Italy is the American company founded by Midge Guerrera – that’s me.  You all know that I’m a published author of numerous books and plays. The retreat gives me time to work on that next epic. Our team knows how to produce a retreat. Remember along with Rossella and Annarita Mancini, I’m the founder of the award-winning program, Cooking in the Kitchens of Pontelandolfo.  That local team will be the on-site organizers for the retreat.

Here is what you get for one fee:

  • Round Trip Transportation from the Benevento Train Station.
  • 7 nights in shared, large double rooms with unique, architecturally-appointed ensuite bathrooms in La Locanda della Presuntuosa. Enjoy the swimming pool, tennis court and trails. (There is also an optional 3-bedroom, 2-bathroom village apartment for 2 to 3 participants in the historic village center.)
  • All meals cooked by an Italian chef. Vegetarians can be accommodated.
  • Four morning workshop sessions, including “Location as a Character” that will be held at the Altilia Saepinum Archeological site.
  • Daily group critique sessions
  • 1-to-1 personal critique sessions – on your schedule.
  • Welcoming “Bar Crawl” –  Drinks and local snacks included. Discover off-site places to write while absorbing local Italian culture. Transportation to bars provided daily.

We are organizing cultural add ons too. I can tell the interested writers all about those. For now, shoot me an email at info@nonnasmulberrytree.com for more information. Remember this is limited to only EIGHT WRITERS.

Ci Vediamo.

Midge

Riohana – Morcone’s Cocktail House

by midgeguerrera, posted in Any Day in Pontelandolfo, Food - Eating In and Out!

It was hard to imagine we were in the medieval village next door to Pontelandolfo. Riohana Cocktail House, is a hip bar with a Manhatten vibe. What exactly makes this a cool place? Could it be the drink menu designed by an ace mixologist; the laid back jungle atmosphere replete with couches, cozy tables both indoors and out; an outrageous bar menu; and gastropub fare that goes way beyond the mundane? With two out of town guests, Jack and I put on our party clothes and drove to Morcone to find out.

Ever curious, we wondered what the two story building balancing on a mountain ledge had been. A blacksmith’s shop was the answer. Hmm, I thought, a walled in outdoor terrace with a metal gate to the street – corral? Did horses head to a watering trough neighing about their new shoes? We never did find the answer. We did find an adult watering trough that made us whinny with delight.

Mattia Cioccia is the bartender/manager and creative force behind the Riohana Cocktail House. He is also the reason we went. I first met Mattia years ago when he was a bartender at Pontelandolfo’s Landulphi pub and restaurant. We bonded when I made him laugh by reminding him in barely there Italian that I was an American woman and could handle a double pour of vodka, gin, scotch etc. Mattia is a first rate mixologist and has a delightful personality. His bar menu at Riohana had enticing names like –

Since gin is one of my go to beverages, I felt compelled to try “Ant-Ree.” Floating on top was a toasted mini mandarin slice. I could picture the ants marching along carrying their citrus find. It was delicious. So delicious that – no I will not reveal how many adult beverages I can consume and still wend my way home on mountain goat paths. Each of us had a different drink. Each drink was unique and perfectly blended. Mattia knows his stuff.

The kitchen didn’t disappoint us either. We started with the €3 each “Tagliere/aperitivo.” Snacks to accompany our cocktails that were interesting. Don’t tell Jack that the open faced tramezzini he gulped down was made with pickled eggplant. After another drink or three we realized that ordering something heartier might be appropriate. They have essentially a hot sandwich, panini, menu.

The green beverage you see in the background is a gin and basil drink. I’ve had it before and think I also had one that night. Gulp. Back to the sandwiches. We each got a sandwich cut in four parts. Swapping and tasting was the idea, my Alpi e Appennini was so scrumptious that I cried when I shared. Great tasting, fresh ingredients made each one exceptional.

The best news? Jack and I after an enjoyable night out in Morcone spent only €36. Are you all starting to understand why we love spending time in the Sannio Hills? Great stuff and prices we can afford. We will return to Riohana Cocktail House.

Ci Vediamo!

Midge

FOODIES TAKE NOTICE

The time is now to organize your pals to come and Cook in the Kitchens of Pontelandolfo! We are setting up 2025 spring and summer’s programs now.
Email me at info@nonnamulberrytree.com

thre is no better way to start cooking than with a bar crawl! Cook, Eat, Laugh!

Culinary, Cultural and Cursing Adventures

by midgeguerrera, posted in Any Day in Pontelandolfo

Three Cs for the discerning tourist. Culinary treats, Cultural experiences and Cursing in a new language – complete with gestures. Vafan#@$%!

Did she say cursing adventures? Our sweet American lady in her third act would never suggest one come to Pontelandolfo to learn to flip the bird in another language. Midge would never ever simply curse in another language!

Dear readers, I might curse in multi languages at the same time, but is that really the same as cursing in another language which implies one language? 🤣

Sigh… The title for this concept was not my idea. For this new tourism initiative, I must give credit where credit is due. It was the idea of the witty, wise and wee bit snarky women from Baltimore who were here for our last Cooking in the Kitchen of Pontelandolfo experience. One of them suggested that the name for our activity should be the three cs culinary, cultural and cursing adventures. Cursing in another language is the true mark of an educated person.

For the sake of decorum, I will not reveal which of these howling ladies came up with the idea.

I thought about this idea, it really does make sense. What follows is X rated and not for those folks who have never cursed and will never curse.

When we’re happy we curse. When we’re angry we curse. When we’re sad we curse. But what language do we curse in? When I was a kid, I cursed. OK the only curse I really knew was the F bomb. Both my parents used the F bomb. After a while, the F bomb became simply a yawn bomb.

Now in Italy, I’m hearing curse words light. Simple ones like caspita which means damn or merde which means poop and the list goes on. What our guests were referring to were the words dashed out by the men playing scopa in the piazza or arguing over bocci points. Words like stronzo, che cazzo, or bastardo. You can look them up, I am too embarrassed to define them.

Susan at age one was whispering “eat shit.”
I replied the family password, “and die.”

Sadly, I must admit my sweet sister Susan and I would often say something horrific to each other. Usually, after my mother blamed the wrong one for some egregious error. Imagine my delight to discover that we could share the love in Italian with – mangia merde e morte! Sounds so much better in the language of Dante.

But seriously, our tourism inattive has gone beyond cooking. Speaking of cursing, we have a fabulous group of playwrights coming in October. THERE IS ONE SPOT LEFT MESSAGE ME FOR DETAILS. I am a playwright and I curse. Does that imply all playwrights curse? No, but I a betting a few F bombs dash out on pages just to add a bit of reality.

If you would like an experience that goes beyond the backpack carrying mass tour and experience literally Italy, including a smattering of bad words. Send me a message. We are setting up experiences for 2025 now. Together we create something unique and real. I cannot guarantee you will hear cursing. I can guarantee it will be an experience you won’t forget.

Ci Vediamo

Midge

Check out our new updated website for Cooking in the Kitchens of Pontelandolo!

Can’t get to Italy this year? Read my book Cars, Castles, Cows and Chaos and live the life with me.

Where is Fernando Fiat today? Read Cars, Castles, Cows and Chaos.

Boom, Bang, Ouch and GRAZIE A TUTTI

by midgeguerrera, posted in Any Day in Pontelandolfo

Have you missed me? Sorry, I’ve been so silent, but life in New Jersey had some ups and downs. Speaking of ups and downs. Boom, bang – no not thank you mam – but my blood all over the nice marble floor of Aeroporto Fiumicino. Caspita! I’ve always had stars in my eyes but this wasn’t my favorite way to find new ones.

I am now – thanks to family, friends and the medical system – fine. Swollen knees, cracked teeth, ditzy witzy head and a hole in my lower lip ain’t gonna keep me down. Yes, I did all the right things – went to doctors, dentists, got X-rays and an MRI. (Panoramic X-Ray of my teeth – €40. MRI of my fabulous head – €100.) That’s the boring part of the tale. This is actually one of those “feel good” stories.

BACKSTORY –

Why were my eyeglasses on the floor over there? Hmm? Opening my eyes, the first thing I saw were my eyeglasses floating above my ear. My ears were very active –

Signora, mi senti? Ma’am can you hear me? Yes I could hear her – what is in my mouth? Why is my nose smelling the floor?

Tutto OK? Was I OK? Bo? I haven’t an idea – the floor looks good – nice marbling. I was asked that by about six different people. Was I finally an extra in the Law and Order franchise?? Damn, what fun. Do I get the SAG day rate??

Apparently, after we got off the plane, which had been held for about 3 hours on the tarmac in Newark, NJ, got Jack a wheel chair ( his aching back won’t tolerate super long walks), I fainted.

Sta sanguinando! She’s bleeding! Whose bleeding? Shit is that wet stuff under my mouth my blood? Shit, it is my blood. People, speaking a variety of languages, were tossing blood soaking up things at me and putting them on my lower lip and chin. No one was afraid to touch the bloody lady sprawled on the floor.

Two woman helped me sit up. Whoa – sitting on the floor was a nice change from eating the floor but I wasn’t going anywhere else. Weee, the merry go round is fun! We’re my underpants clean and not ancient?

Chiamare i pronto scorso! Someone called the EMTs and suddenly I was in a chair being prodded and poked.

There had been a female vigile near by who not only had seen everything, but with the incredible woman pushing Jack’s wheelchair got me to sit on the floor and carried all pazillion pounds of me to a nearby chair. How did the chair got there? She explained to the head EMT (doctor) that I was walking perfectly well and then suddenly like a waterfall slowly wafted to the floor smacking my face/head. Wafted to the floor – was that a Graham dance move or was I once again channeling Ruth St. Denis?

Good goddess, why is Midge telling us all this horrific tale? Because “she” – me – I was treated like visiting royalty. Every staff person who interacted with me was genuinely concerned, courteous and terrific. OK, OK, I can hear you cynics thinking – they just worry about lawsuits. In Italy a lawsuit would take 100 years.

I am telling this tale because I want to publicly thank the woman pushing Jack who then called for a wheel chair for me and organized our getting through passport control, getting our luggage and even asking a pal at lost luggage to leave her spot and find Jack’s lost bag. Damn, she was great, as was the other woman who was stuck pushing me and dragging my carryon.

The vigile must have called the accident in and two oh so handsome men in superior uniforms arrived to check our passports and calmed me down in English. Actually, they both had luminous dark eyes and maybe that’s what calmed me down.

The EMT staff was there quickly and acted professionally. As a woman was taking my blood pressure and oxygen levels another was looking in my eyes. Everything they checked was perfect – even my sugar levels. They wanted to transport me to the hospital in Rome, I wanted to go home. After signing a release that I was refusing the hospital, I was not allowed to stand and transferred to the wheelchair. Grazie Mille a tutti.

This is one of the reasons I had to get home. Our first group of culinary adventurers were arriving June 8 and I landed June 1.

I want to thank Giuseppe who was our ride home from the airport. He literally waited hours for us and didn’t laugh at my bloody swollen face once – well maybe once. He was a gem.

Once I landed on the couch in our house, I received incredible support. Thank you Annarita for all you do. Thank you Mariann and Jeff for making sure I wasn’t comatose and fed. Thank you Carmella and Giusy for making sure I had help, appointments for X-rays and doctor visits. Thank you Rossella for keeping me sane. Thank you Zia Vittoria for getting edibles in my empty refrigerator. Thank you to the men in my life Jack, Nicola and Mario.

Thank you all.

Stay tuned for more about life in a small Southern Italian village.

Ci vediamo.